Reading Response #4: Lovely, Dark and Deep

     I'm nearing the end of Lovely, Dark and Deep by Amy McNamara. Wren, the narrator and main character, lives with her dad. She moved there after she was in a drunk driving accident where her boyfriend Patrick was killed. She has met and is dating a new boy named Cal Owen. She is trying to settle into a new "normal". She is struggling with this because the accident left her with a great deal of emotional trauma and issues. 

     After a not-so-helpful visit to a psychiatrist, Wren goes for a run in the middle of a cold winter night. She is found laying on some rocks not far from her house. She is starting to get hypothermia and has to be hospitalized. During this situation, the title of the book begins to make sense. Wren says, 

"The woods are dark and deep, and I run through them until I can't feel anything anymore...I tear through deeper and deeper parts of the woods. Like if I'm fast enough, the forest might open up and let me in for real. I run until I'm burning. My lungs screaming in my chest, my muscles on fire. My heart's a machine" (Page 243).

      In this passage, it becomes apparent that Wren finds comfort in the woods. They are an escape for her, and they help her to forget anything else while she is running through them. Being in the woods allows Wren to find a state of calm when she is having an emotional breakdown. This photo is what I imagine the woods look like for Wren. They are beautiful and act as a safe place for her to go.


     Even though Wren's midnight run makes her seem like a lunatic, it opens her eyes. Her family's reaction to seeing her on the fringe of death makes her realize that she is loved. She sees that they really are on her side, wanting everything to be okay for her. She begins to take steps on the way to feeling happy and normal again.

Reading Response #3: Lovely, Dark and Deep

     Here I am, still reading Lovely, Dark and Deep by Amy McNamara. Thus far, the main character, Wren, has moved in with her dad after getting in an accident which killed her boyfriend, Patrick. She suffered many emotional problems such as flashbacks and crying fits. She turned to poetry and running to try and cope with these issues. She has met a new boy named Cal, and after trying to shut him out, she decides to let him have a part in her life. She also had a friend named Mary, who was an intern with Wren's father, an artist. Mary has just finished her internship and moved away, being replaced by the new intern, Nick, who Wren finds completely repulsive. 

     Previously, Wren has been extremely depressed. She would get upset about something, and go on a two hour run through the woods alone, crying the entire time. But now, she's transformed into an almost-normal person. She still has smaller flashbacks, or gets caught up in memories, but for the most part, she's learning how to be happy again. It almost seems like she doesn't want to let herself be happy, but she is trying. Her father's intern, Mary plays a huge role in that. When Wren realizes that she is slowly becoming "normal" again, she says,

  "I hang up. Try to get my head together. My face is burning. I just had a conversation with a guy who likes me. A guy I like. I'm going shopping with Mary. Look at me. I'm a regular person" (page 117). 

     This passage is significant because it is when she realizes that maybe, just maybe, things might turn out okay. Wren's transformation from a sad, emotional person into an almost happy, not quite so emotional person makes me really happy. Her character was shaped by the people around her, as well as time. She does, however, like to go back and forth between being happy and being depressed still. It seems like she puts on a happy face in front of people, but deep down she's still broken. This drawing of a girl that is half happy, half sad reminds me of Wren. For every smile that she plasters on her face, there's an emotional breakdown. I think that Wren's true feelings and personality will be revealed soon (hopefully!). I'm looking forward to finishing the rest of the book.

Reading Response #2: Lovely, Dark, and Deep

     Somehow, I'm still trying to finish Lovely, Dark, and Deep by Amy McNamara. Not because I don't like this book, because I do. I'm actually really enjoying reading it.

     So far in the book, we have met Wren, the main character and narrator. She has a lot of personal issues. She was involved in an accident which caused everything in her life to be changed. She lives with her dad and has met a new boy named Cal. Previously, she tried to shut Cal out of her life but she has started to let him in. Wren is trying to create a new "normal" despite several flashbacks and emotional outbursts. 

This little girl reminds me of Wren, how she's shutting Cal out.

      Something that really confuses me about this book is Wren's relationship with Cal. At first, she thinks Cal is trying to take her in as a "project". She fears that her father asked him to spend time with her and fix her, so she would stop moping around. I think Cal also reminds Wren of Patrick, her former boyfriend. She doesn't want those thoughts in her head, so she pushes him away however she can. She says, "I'm not getting tangled up in anything again. With anyone. Not like this. Especially because my parents planned it" (Page 80). It was actually pretty childish how she shuts him out. 

     PLOT TWIST! Wren feels an emptiness in her life and realizes that the void is where Cal should be. She craves his presence, and decides to make him a constant part of her life. She's afraid he will think she has gone off the deep end, because of her emotional problems; however, she is delighted to find out that Cal is still interested in her. She goes over to his house one day, and their relationship is rekindled. Their encounter was pretty sappy:

"He leans his head closer, touches my cheek. My heart is going to stop. "I'd really like to kiss you," he says. Looks at me. I couldn't say no if I tried. I lean toward him. I have nothing left to lose," (Page 104).

     This passage is significant because it shows how Wren's feelings about Cal have changed. Their relationship is kind of annoying because Wren can't decide what she wants. Sometimes, she blocks him out because she doesn't want to have feelings for anyone. Other times, she's obsessed with him and can't stop talking about him. She needs to make up her mind. It reminds me of a little girl with a flower, like the one in the photo, saying "he loves me, he loves me not." Puke. 

     Don't get me wrong, this book really is pretty interesting. Wren, the main character is very intriguing, even though her life is full of drama. With the exception of the teenage sappiness, it's realistic and even somewhat relatable.